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String Parsing in SQL Server

Erik Darling shows off one way to search for strings in T-SQL:

First, I want to advise you to avoid doing things as much as possible like this in T-SQL. Use CLR, if you can. Or do it outside of your really expensive database server.

You know, rational choices.

YOU’RE NOT MY REAL DAD, ERIK!

Do read the post, especially because it’s not just slapping a LIKE '%x%' on there and calling it a day.